


falsum.

by orphxus (impxria)



Category: Tokyo Ghoul
Genre: F/M, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-11-03
Updated: 2015-11-03
Packaged: 2018-04-29 16:49:29
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 866
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5135231
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/impxria/pseuds/orphxus
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>
  <span class="small">something went terribly wrong;</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span class="small">my heart is still remembering.</span>
</p>
            </blockquote>





	falsum.

i saw you again,   
i cried.

He thought he needed to protect you-- to burn every trace of him that remained with you. So he left. He left without a single word-- no warning, no goodbye.

Nothing.

Because it was for the best. You couldn’t get involved-- if anything happened to you, he would lose grasp on what little control he had left of his sanity.

He didn’t abandon you completely. You remained oblivious, but he was always there, always watching in case something were to go wrong-- or worse, if someone were to try to hurt you.

But he never realized that it was only him hurting you.

 **.     .     .**

You still see him sometimes. Maybe you’ve gone insane from this false sense of hope that continues to cling to you; you miss him so much that you imagine it’s him-- not some passerby on the street.

_Stupid._

You can’t let go, no matter how hard you try. Because you don’t know where he’s gone. You don’t know why he left. You don’t know if he’s okay.

You don’t even know if he’s _alive_.

Because the Kaneki you know would never leave without saying anything.

There are days where you nearly forget about him-- about the grief so deeply buried in your heart, but there are days where you can’t get him out of your head. You remember the happy moments with him-- remembering how you first met, how shy he was-- that cute stutter and the blush that came with it. You remember Hide desperately asking if you knew where he was; you remember your vision blurring when you saw the picture of him on that poster.

_Missing._

Today is one of those bad days. You can never forget him.

Despite the chatter that fills the busy streets of Tokyo, you register none of it. Every step feels like lead, movements stiff and forced as you absentmindedly stare forward, blocking out every face that comes into view. Hood over your head, the harshness of the rain falling on you goes unnoticed. The fabric of your attire clings to your skin, but the numbness in your body is not from the cold-- it has always been there.

It’s only when someone rushes past you that you're knocked back in reality-- not to mention someone, as well. Shaken out of the trance, you find yourself leaning against another for support, their arm wrapped around your waist as a hand grips your wrist firmly. Embarrassment seeps in quickly as you tell the stranger that you’re alright, though you note how their grasp tightens by the smallest amount before they let go with reluctance. Standing straight, you bow in an act of gratefulness before reminding yourself of proper manners, taking off the hood that covers your features. 

You’re too flustered to even take a good look at this person, but when you do, the color drains from your face.

_Kaneki._

something went terribly wrong;

No, no, _no_ \-- it’s not him. It’s **not** him.

It can’t be.

my heart is still ~~ʀ ᴇ ᴍ ᴇ ᴍ ʙ ᴇ ʀ ɪ ɴ ɢ~~.

White locks of hair, gray eyes-- this is not him. Still, you can’t tear your gaze away, mouth agape as you try to comprehend the sight before you. He seems familiar-- feels familiar, yet part of you knows that Kaneki is gone. Apathy is displayed in gray hues, although a flicker of bewilderment appears-- but it doesn’t last long enough for you to notice.

The tears trail down your face before you realize-- but it’s too late. Regardless of the rain, he still sees them. The stranger’s eyes widen, desires ignored as he fights to not comfort you, to not tell you it’s him-- to not apologize for leaving you.

“I’m sorry,” you say, a choked laugh filling the heavy air, “you just remind me of someone I knew.”

_Who?_

But he doesn’t dare ask-- you would recognize his voice in a heartbeat, no matter how much time has passed since it’s last been heard.

Lips pursed tightly, you offer another bow before a forced smile crosses your features.

“Thank you for catching me.”

The tears do not stop. As long as this man is in your sight, you can’t stop thinking about Kaneki. Everything about this stranger reminds you of him, regardless of how different he may be. 

So you leave. You leave him, remaining ignorant to his true identity-- and the image of him burns in your mind.

He does not stop you.

The hybrid remains in that same spot for what feels like ages, chest constricted as the sorrow overwhelms him. He despises himself-- whatever the hell he’s become. He was never protecting you, was he?

Only running and running because he was so afraid. Afraid of seeing what would happen if you saw him in this state. And after all that has occurred, he can’t bear it. But no matter where he goes, no matter how much he tries to distance himself, he'll always find himself coming back to you.

He may have gotten stronger, but in the end, he still could not protect you.

Not even from himself.

 _there’s nowhere to ｒｕｎ from you._


End file.
